We have many ways of expressing our selves and I think our hair is one of them.
How we look and how we feel about ourselves is played out nearly everyday by what we choose to wear, how much time we can or can’t spend on what to wear and our hair and makeup.
Growing up in my household, Mum reinforced time and time again the need for a bright lipstick. She would apply it in the car, before we got out to go to netball training, before doing the shopping, doctors appointments you name it. The bright lippy (hot pink) has been like a beacon of protection through most experiences in my younger years. According to mum “bright lippy lifts your face and tells people you care about how you look even if you are feeling crap.” (my interpretation of her words).
My protective blanket has always been my hair.
As a small child I was tall, awkward and had quite a distinctive scar on my cheek from an accident I had as a child (i later had it corrected in my teens).
This scar defined how I felt about myself, whether people could see it or not, I always felt it was there. I never felt truly pretty until late into my twenties when I met the love of my life.
Growing up I had beautiful hair – long flowing tresses that I could wear close to my head and almost hide my scar. I hid behind my hair and like my mum with her lippy if I was feeling insecure or needed a lift a quick release of hair from it’s pony tail had me sailing through the day / event and feeling good about myself. (nothing like a good old hair flick huh?).
For the past couple of months I have wanted to cut off that hair to see how I would feel without it. I felt like I had been holding onto for too long and it was time to be free of it and be another version of me.
So I started researching hair.
I wanted something cool, something modern and something edgy. I didn’t want to hide behind boring long hair any longer.
I found the cut I wanted and decided it was time to turbo the blonde too.
My hairdresser was cautious when I booked the apt. The 3 other women having their hair done at the same time said ‘DON’T DO IT” “I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO HAVE YOUR HAIR”.
“Hair shmair I said… cut it off!”
So off it came and as it fell to the floor the sense of freedom and lightness is hard to describe.
I am half way through my transformation. I have had a shoulder length choppy bob now, but the next cut will be the one I am after - shorter, more angled and more blonde.
We are all connected to elements about ourselves that we think define us, that we think make us who we are. I have just learnt that my long hair is not one of these elements for me. I thought it gave me confidence and defined me – Kate with the long hair.
Now I can be Kate with the sparkling eyes, cheeky wit, or creative hands.
I can be any Kate I want to be.
Do you have one thing that you think defines you that you would like to let go??